Forms of Database Torture (Illustrated)

Many forms of disasters can happen to a database. Here are three I’ve seen lately.

My Database Is On Fire

My Database Is On Fire

There's a reason they keep datacenters cool

My Database Has Been Hacked

My Database Has Been Hacked

Ouch!

My Database is Responding Erratically

Database Under Attack

"Is there Tuna in There?"

About Kendra Little

Kendra likes queries, indexes, bicycles, lattes, the Oregon Coast, and throwing an orange ball for her dog, in no particular order.
  • eccentricDBA

    Here I thought when the database was on fire it was a good thing.

    “We just moved all of our databases to Solid State Disks and now the Databases are on fire.”

    “Yeah, they are smoking.”

    • http://littlekendra.com Kendra Little

      That’s a good point. Smoking hot is good.

      You just want to avoid making the ceiling sprinklers go off.

  • http://www.sqlsoldier.com Robert L Davis

    Excellent! here’s one: My Database is Bottlenecked

    http://www.sqlsoldier.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/DBBottleneck.jpg

  • Joe Celko

    Where are “fragmented” and “denormalized” ?